I'll throw my 2 cents in here. I was a competetive handgun shooter in college, been to numberous tactical and defense training programs and own several guns and many different ones over the years.
I'm always a bit puzzled that people scoff at the smaller caliber options. Unless you're way up in the north where people wear multiple layers of thick leather and such, a .38... even a .32 will certainly work just fine. I know, I know... you could have a crystal meth addict attack you... yeah... I've heard all that. You should prepare for the most like scenario, not some far-fetched chiche that people keep regurgitating.
For in home defense, I'd steer clear of any ported or compensated handgun. I'm a huge fan of ported and comped guns and own a Springfield Armory XD ported 40 caliber. I love that gun. However, it's not a weapon I would put on my nightstand. If you've ever shot a gun at night, or even in a dimly lit range, you'll note the significance of muzzle flash. A ported gun, amplifies this many times over and can make it very difficult to see after the first shot in a darkened enviroment like your house at night. Yes even with a flashlight or gun mounted torch to ID targets (which is first and foremost prior to pulling a trigger) the muzzle flash from a ported gun can impair your vision. If you've ever watched drag racing at night, you'll see what I mean. You don't even notice the flames at daytime, but at night, the exhaust looks like flame throwers. Same thing with a ported handgun.
The benefit of revolver is simply simplicity and that goes a long way in a stressfull situation. You have to be willing to put the time in to train excessively with whatever weapon you choose. Semi-autos have all sorts of benefits, but you introduce a level of complication if you will, a level of mechanics that can create problems that a revolover just wouldn't, or really... can't have. Unless you spinning the cradle and wrist twist slapping it shut like in the movies, it's just simply going to work. Out of the thousands upon thousands of rounds I've shot in my lifetimes, I can say with complete certaintly that I've never had a revolver malfunction. I can't say the same for my semi-autos... even those which were fully custom from the frame up built by expert gunsmiths.
For me, my nightstand gun is a 1911 .45, my carry gun is either my XD 40, or my custom 1911 lightweight commander. My wife's gun is a lightweight Ruger .38 revolver and my overall home defense, chaos in the streets, weapon are my AR's.
the weapon you choose is all specific to your needs. There is no one choice, nor can anyone choose for you. Think about the realistic scenarios you may find yourself in, think about how you'd use your weapon in that scenario, decide what will and won't be affective, then temper it all with what you can legitmately master.
