We joke about WAF all of the time but it's a matter of respect. We both worked full time. We both paid off the mortgage. Both our names are on title. I would have to be a complete ass to tell my wife, screw you, I'm doing whatever I feel like. I may use the space more than she does, but she also enjoys the HT experience on occasion. It's a partnership so I ask her opinion on the things she cares about. She cares about decor, but we still always shop together. Every paint colour, carpet pattern and big piece of furniture was purchased together. We have similar tastes so there have never been any big arguments.
Household finances are going to affect this of course. Some couples keep separate bank accounts, and thus are free to spend what they want as long as the bills get paid. We've had a joint account since we bought the house, which was before we got married. I look at things logically and separate finances leads to arguments about who contributes how much and who pays for what. We do have separate savings accounts for personal stuff so as to maintain some autonomy but it's all about balance. I'll admit I'm blessed, though. My wife is not a shopper, like some of our neighbours who seem to bring shopping bags home every week. She loves to travel and worked as a travel consultant, so she saves up for big trips and I let her do all of the planning. Car is on it's last breath? She saves up for a down payment on the next one. We have a great relationship and while I consider us decidedly middle-class and far from wealthy, we rarely argue about finances.
So, yeah, if I put a big screen in the living room, she'll get a say as to where it goes and what style cabinet we'll get for the components. I'll pick out the model and features as that's my area of expertise, but she'll have a say on what the budget will be. If I wanted to do all of this entirely on my own, well, I wouldn't have gotten married in the first place then.
