I'm with you on this! We are partners, not supervisors.
Like my wife will call and ask if it is OK to go out with the co-workers for a drink after work. I tell her, "you don't need my permission, be safe and give me a call if you need a driver".
And, I don't need my wife's permission to spend $ on something that will bring me (or us) greater satisfaction or value than $ in our pocket would. Now, for a large purchase that may be something that we don't NEED, maybe $600+ or so, I will usually run it by her first as a courtesy, and to be sure there isn't some other large expense coming up that I forgot about.
And, if I were still single, my audio, bicycle, and other hobbies would likely be out of control. Not that the wifey nags me about it, but it is good to have another person that you trust to help keep you in check.
Have you ever heard the saying:
A woman marries a man and expects him to change, and he does not.
A man marries a woman expecting her not to change, but she does.