Penis van Lesbian
A good-looking man walked into an agent’s office in Hollywood.
“I want to be a movie star,” he told the agent. Tall, handsome and with experience on Broadway, he had the right credentials.
The agent asked: “What’s your name?”
“Penis van Lesbian,” he replied.
“Sir, I hate to tell you,” said the agent, “but in order to get into Hollywood, you are going to have to change your name.”
“I will NOT change my name! The van Lesbian name is centuries old. I will not
disrespect my grandfather by changing my name. Never!”
“Now listen: I have worked in Hollywood for years and I’m telling you that will NEVER go far in Hollywood with a name like Penis van Lesbian. Change your name - or I won’t be able to put you on our books.”
“So be it! I guess we will not do business together,” the guy said, and left the agent’s office.
...time passes...
Five years later, The agent opens an envelope sent to his office - inside is a letter and a check for $50,000.
"Dear Sir,
Five years ago, I came into your office wanting to become an actor in Hollywood. You told me I would never make it in Hollywood with a name like Penis van Lesbian.
After I left your office, I thought about what you said and, eventually, decided you were right: I had to change my name.
I’m afraid I had too much pride to return to your office, so I signed with another agent. But I would never have made it without changing my name, so the enclosed cheque is a token of my appreciation.
Thank you for your advice.
Sincerely,
**** (short for Richard) van Dyke"
