"How far are you along?" ............... "I'm not pregnant..."

[Bluesmoke]

So how was I supposed to know? A co-worker of mine, who took a leave for about a year to travel with her husband, recently joined again. She has what looks like a pot-belly. She was skinny (or reasonably fit) when she left in early 2008.

Anyways, a bunch of us were having a conversation when she came by. Myself being the enthusiastic guy that I am asked with a smile: "So, how far along are you?" A hush fell over. Everyone stopped talking. I immediately thought that I must've asked a very common/stupid question - that everyone knew how far along the pregnancy she was in except for myself.

She simply said "I'm not pregnant", looked disgusted and left. I couldn't even get the words "I'm sorry" out and I was stunned when it finally hit me.

How the hell was I supposed to know?

 

[mike c]

heehee. wouldn't wanna be ya

what a booboo, you'll probably never live that down.

 

[Sheep]

Golden rule, it doesn't matter if don't know, you NEVER assume someone is pregnant. Even if she asks you to touch her belly to feel the baby kick, you wait until she says it.

Walk it off,
SheepStar

 

[Davemcc]

That's pretty embarrasing for both of you but hilarious to me. Maybe she'll even take this as a wake up call to lose the paunch.

 

[Djizasse]

LOL
I tend to loose weight when I travel.

 

[jamie2112]

Wanna get away?????

 

[Midcow2]

Been there

I did that at a big family reunion ... .embarassing

 

[MidnightSensi]

That's awesome haha.

I was out one night and wasn't hungry when they were giving out so food, so I just said "nah, I'm going anarexic tonight" and this girl next to me goes "real nice, I'm recovering from an eating disorder" and walked off really pissed.

 

[rnatalli]

She should be disgusted, with herself. Don't be sorry; you're the one that has to look at her.

 

[jinjuku]

LOL
I tend to loose weight when I travel.

Keep telling not to drink the water

 

[jinjuku]

Years ago (97') I was at a cable customers house installing a network card in His PC for cable modem service.

I hear this pitiful, god awful sound of a dog in pain. I asked: What happened to the poor dog?

They guy responded: That is my infant daughter...

 

[ParadigmDawg]

I had a similar situation one day when we were out eating lunch. The cashier at one of those "home cooking" places had a bandage around two of her fingers. Me, trying to the funny guy, said "get your finger stuck in the register?", about the time it came out of my mouth, I noticed she was missing several fingers on both hands. My friend that were in front of me had already noticed and looked horrified that I was making fun of her. She got tears in her eyes, I threw down a $20 tip and ran out of there and never went back. I felt really bad because I was just trying to be funny but I should have assessed the situation a little better first.

 

[mudrummer99]

Well, I'll throw my foot-in-mouth story out there I guess.

I was still in high school and we had a girl transfer in her senior year to live with her father. She was using a cell phone one day and I made a smart aleck remark about "those things'll give you brain cancer" her reply was "probably, that's what my mother died from"

Luckily she was a friend I knew that I had no idea, but still, I felt horrible.

Mike

 

[MatthewB.]

Last week me and some co-workers were telling jokes and yes as guys can be some of em were racist (even though we are not racist and we work with people of all nationalities who tell worse jokes than I do.) Anyway I told a joke about nazi prison camps and then one guy spoke and said. "I want you to know that my grandfather died at Auschwitz" There was a hush in the room and I was so embarrased.

He then smiled and said, "yeah he fell from the guard tower, broke his neck"

Although the joke was in poor taste, for a minute it made me think, geez I gotta be careful of some of the things I say.

 

[annunaki]

Golden rule, it doesn't matter if don't know, you NEVER assume someone is pregnant. Even if she asks you to touch her belly to feel the baby kick, you wait until she says it.

Walk it off,
SheepStar

Oh so true!

 

[Shock]

She should be disgusted, with herself. Don't be sorry; you're the one that has to look at her.

HAHAHAHAHAHA, awesome. +1 point.

 

[darien87]

Same thing happened to my wife's sister. Her own hair dresser asked her how far along she was.

Oh well. Lose some weight.

 

[jamie2112]

I am still laughing....







I have said some dumb things in my time and that was one of them.

 

[Pyrrho]

Golden rule, it doesn't matter if don't know, you NEVER assume someone is pregnant. Even if she asks you to touch her belly to feel the baby kick, you wait until she says it.

Walk it off,
SheepStar

Sheep is absolutely right.

Obviously, Bluesmoke, you are unable to tell the difference between fat and a baby. (If you could tell the difference, you would have known what you were looking at and not have committed a faux pas.) So don't ever pretend that you can tell the difference. Don't ever assume that a large belly means that the person is pregnant.

As for the question of how you were supposed to know, you were supposed to not assume something that you did not know to be true. Your immediate thought that you asked a stupid question was correct.

 

[Alex2507]

I admit that I too wear that same badge of shame.
But I have an excuse.
I was drunk and this couple was telling me about their first kid and she use to be skinny and now she was fat and they weren't speaking English and I was drunk and the music was loud and it wasn't in English and it was late and did I mention that I was drunk?

When she said that she wasn't pregnant I told her we could change that.
Just messin' with ya, I wasn't that drunk.

Edit: Of course the real joke is on me now that I'm the one who looks pregnant.