I know, I was just being comedic. I was born in 1970 and have loved heavy music as long as I can remember so Sabbath was definitely well in my wheelhouse along with Led Zep, Iron Butterfly (Inna Godda Da Vida Baby!), then AC/DC, Iron Maiden and Judas Priest. My parents were both in a band and music was a huge part of my life since I was born.
I LOVED Iron Maiden in my teens and still do, but when Metallica and Megadeth hit the scene they blew my balls off with heavy metal like never before. Then I think the 90's and early 2000's produced some of the heaviest music yet, with bands like Korn, Slipknot and TOOL who took it into a more progressive direction. I'm still open to new and different stuff tho. If someone comes along and somehow makes metal sound even heavier (not necessarily faster or thrashier) I'd love it too.
I think my idea of heavy might be a little different from most in that speed and thrash aren't what makes something sound heavy to me. There's a lot of death and doom metal out there that I don't think sounds all that heavy. More like fast frenetic noise. I like it really tight and controlled, not fast and sloppy. There needs to be a nice, heavy, textured "crunch" to the sound, underscored by strong bass. I still think the beginning of "No Remorse" from Metallica's first ep is one of the heaviest sounding sections of a song I know of.
The whole beginning of that song just sounds so fargin' heavy to me. Oh, and turn that sh!t up! It has some great sounding bass underscoring it too.
