I was a total jackass today... and yesterday... and most of last week too.

[itschris]

I've been in a sh*tty mood for a few days now. Just really pissed.. mostly work stuff. I just hired a new member for my team and somehow her salary got out... probably by some admin. So of course, the two women on my team are having a f*cking fit about it giving me sh*t that she's making close to $150K when most of my seniors are at $100K-$110K total comp. She's better and more experienced and more specialized than all of them. All of the guys get it and have been cool and and some asked how to become more valuable... which I certainly appreciate. The women? ... "it's not fair ... just pay me more... because."

Anyway, so I got so pissed today i just left and went to Jimmy Johns across the street because I had to get back for a meeting. I was fuming. I pulled in and the only parking was for the Ob/Gyn office... which is closed at lunch time so I didn't really care. I get out of the car and there's three women at an outside table by where I parked. This one chick... the kind of fat chick who hates men, pretty girls, and is sour on everything... yells out to me.. "Hey! That spot is for WOMEN!!! That's for women going to see the Dr. You need to move your car!"

Not breaking stride, i looked at them and said, 'Yeah I know. I'm just going to grab a sandwhich, then I'm coming back to get my p*ssy fingered."

She then said, "You're f*cking rude!" as I walked by. I stopped turned around and leaned over and said, "Yes... yes i am!"

I sat in line for a couple minutes and felt really sh*tty for being so rude. I shouldn't have reacted that way despite her behavior. I actually got out of line and went out to apologize, but they had left already. Now I feel bad... which just makes me more angry... just now more at myself.

I'm certain I'm going to pay for that somehow. I'm just waiting...

 

[lsiberian]

Next time drive to the beach or ocean and sit for a while to cool down instead of going were people are.

 

[MidnightSensi2]

I'm sorry your feeling shitty and pissed off. Salaries are sensitive..

You did good by walking away from the office, so take that as a job well done!

Feeling guilty about yelling at the girls is normal, I've been there.

When you feel yourself getting pissed, that's the 'primitive' or limbic part of the brain taking over - it dulls critical thinking. If you can get away and cool down, maybe do something that relaxes you (go surf a forum is one of mine haha), that's huge in getting the rational part of your brain back.

*Source: Girlfriend is a psychologist and I just asked her to read it haha.

 

[ImcLoud]

Hope you feel better, I hate being in a bad mood because I know I am a prick, so I make sure to get away from people because if there is one thing that will make a bad situation worse, its PEOPLE....

Wages are tough business, I always tell my employees that if they find out what someone else earns and doesn't like it they HAVE to find another job, if I get a hint of "I am worth more than him/her" you won't have to worry about it for long because the person that replaces you will be happy with less than you make.. SIMPLE, and I learned to be that way the hard way, no one taught me that one, I had a situation where a 41 year old man was made because the "kid" {30's was making the same as him, but had all the same licenses, had 3 years MORE experience, worked way harder, and NEVER said no when I asked him to come in on a day off or stay late... SO I sat him down and said "I am sorry I have to let you go", he was crying, literally.. {I didn't expect that and had no plan for it} but by the end of the conversation he was ready to take a pay cut {because he knows its a nice place to work, sometimes people need to be reminded, not all of them, just some and sometimes}... He kept his job and still works for me now, BUT NEVER brought up wages again, and after that day I made the rule, you talk money in shop and you are fired... note: the "kid" has started his own business and I helped him do it, hes doing very well now, but I knew he had the drive to do it...

When ever I feel anxious, aggravated, and abused I get alone and shut everything off where ever I am, in my office, in my house, in my truck, ect... I lightly fold my hands and close my eyes I then take 12 deep breaths as I count them up, 1, 2 , 3, 4, well you know how to count and then I open my eyes roll my neck and feel so much better, Ill admit on occasion {not lately but in the past} it has taken 2 attempts, but it always works, don't think about anything but breathing and counting.... A friend of mine that is a navy seal taught me that, the navy taught them to do it every morning and night, its a type of meditation with out getting all yoga and lighting candles... It works...

ANOTHER thing that works very well and I am not sure if you have them where you are but http://www.massageenvy.com I think its $50 a month, but well worth it... Its better than going to the bar... you can try this coupon if you go... lol

 

[defmoot]

First thing, sorry to hear you had a bad day. I hate it when I eff up and have to eat my own crow later. Just proves you're a good guy.

Second thing, where do people get off telling perfect strangers what they can and can't do. Fat chick was lucky all she got were a few words.

Third thing, you should've asked her to go get you your sammich, so you could watch your car in case any "patients" showed up.

 

[j_garcia]

My problem is, I hate people I am a really nice guy most of the time, but there are so many chuckleheads out there who just really annoy the heck out of me that I just get tired of it. There are so many idiots out there who have no concern for anyone other than themselves. It really bugs me.

There's hope though. The other day a guy broke down in rush hour traffic blocking two lanes because he tried to get over and couldn't. I watched at least 10 cars go around this guy at one light and admittedly, I did also, but I made my U turn and parked and came back to help. By the time I got there, one dude had already gotten out and pushed the car across 2 lanes of traffic BY HIMSELF. His girlfriend was still in the car and looked at me and smiled and shrugged so I waved and left. That's was nice of him. I like to see that sort of thing, but it seems to be extremely rare these days, at least in the area where I work. In the town I call home, people are a lot different and you can feel it.

It was the right thing to try to apologize for that comment, but you know what, it wasn't really her business to tell you that in the first place. You knew it was wrong and were prepared for consequences if necessary. The comment was a bit uncalled for too, but was harmless IMHO, and you're right, she's the kind that kind of chick so she probably had it coming too.

 

[Adam]

I agree - it was good of you to feel like you should go apologize and then actually make an attempt to, and really not her place to yell at you to begin with when the doctor's office wasn't even open. She could have politely said something about it, but it doesn't sound like she approached it that way. Of course, you were mad and processing it through your filter, so maybe she actually was polite.

Anyway, sorry the salary got out and it hit the fan. Sure sounds like I should be making more, though...you know...because...

 

[rnatalli]

Second thing, where do people get off telling perfect strangers what they can and can't do. Fat chick was lucky all she got were a few words.

I'm with you. Unless she had a badge, she should keep her trap shut. He could have been there to pick up his wife or girlfriend for all she knew.

 

[Rickster71]

I've been in a sh*tty mood for a few days now. Just really pissed.. mostly work stuff. I just hired a new member for my team and somehow her salary got out... probably by some admin.

Sounds like some admin should be fired.

 

[itschris]

I floated in the pool last night, in the rain, drinking a bottle of fairly expensive wine out of the bottle. Nancy came out to talk to me and we finally got to the bottom of what was really bothering me. Each year, we go out and buy supplies for the two elementary schools in the not so great part of town. They're both "F" graded schools, predominately balck and hispanic. When Walmart and Office Depot have their big sales, we fill a bunch of storage bins with paper, folders, notebooks, pencils, markers, backpacks, shoes, etc. We give one of the schools a laptop each year... nothing fancy, usueally one of our old ones, but something that they can really use. My daughter didn't go there. I don't know anyone there, but I do know they have pretty much zero parent participation or help.

So I took the morning off to make the deliveries and every year it's the same. The office is overwhelmed with obnoxious parents who haven't done a damn thing they were supposed to for their child's enrollment. School's been on for 30 minutes and there are still kids being dropped off. The parent rolls up to the curb with their 24's all nice and shiny and their kid jumps out with no books, no backpack, pencil... anything. It's like that every year, car after car. The administration is very grateful, yet I get looks of distaste from the rude mothers, swearing and disparaging staff who are trying to fix the problems that they themselves created... all of it in front of their childdren. They all look me and give me attitude as I bring this stuff in... sort of ... "who does this white guy in a suit think he is."

I've made a point to simply smile and hear and speak only to the staff. They're ridiculously greatful and their thanks are sincere. They're in a losing battle and they know it, though they pretend very well to believe they're making a difference... sort of like I do. I actually don't care about blacks, hispanics, Asians, whites... whoever... I just want everyone to at least contribute something other than turmoil and conflict. I look around and see everyone taking... but not too many giving. We're all supposed to live in denial and pretend everything is okay. We can't address any problems... be it crime, fatherless homes, failing students, broken homes, etc.. because that would often times point to differing segments of society... either race or culture... so we can't do that.

Either way, it's totally disheartening. My hope for things to be better has been crushed. It started when I was the foreman in that damn murder trial a few months ago (that I wrote about) where I saw firsthand the animalistic nature of people in our society. I no longer think things will turnaround. We have a government who actually encourages this behavior and have created a culture that labels you racist, priviledged, etc., if you raise concern or point out facts. There would have to be a huge momentus shift in opinion and thought, followed by swift, unpopular, and punishing action. People would have to suffer... for their own good and good of society. it'll never happen though. Everyone is too used to going out with the singular pupose of "getting theirs."

There was one lady, particularly rude and aggressive, swearing at everyone, etc. She said to one of the ladies... a volunteer in her sixties... "I don't need to listen to some stupid ol'e white b*tch." I walked over to her, litterally about to punch her in the face. I mean I literally wanted to beat her within an inch of her life. I grabbed one of the backpacks and said, I see that your son doesn't have a backpack. I knelt down and said do you like Ninja Turtles or IronMan? I gave him the turtle bag walked over to the volunteer lady gave her a hug and went out to my car and came within a nanosecond of crying.

Nancy said to me last night... "You're not angry... you're just sad and you don't know how to deal with it." I don't know maybe. I think I'm pretty angry. I'm sick of how people behave. I"m tired of society not addressing the downward spiral of our culture and not calling a spade a spade. I'm pretty much with J Garcia who posted above... I pretty much hate everyone. My biggest fear is that I'm going to start becoming part of the problem. I feel like I want to just stick my head in the sand too. I don't want to give or help anymore. I'm just tired of seeing all that and nothing ever changing.

 

[ImcLoud]

I floated in the pool last night, in the rain, drinking a bottle of fairly expensive wine out of the bottle. Nancy came out to talk to me and we finally got to the bottom of what was really bothering me. Each year, we go out and buy supplies for the two elementary schools in the not so great part of town. They're both "F" graded schools, predominately balck and hispanic. When Walmart and Office Depot have their big sales, we fill a bunch of storage bins with paper, folders, notebooks, pencils, markers, backpacks, shoes, etc. We give one of the schools a laptop each year... nothing fancy, usueally one of our old ones, but something that they can really use. My daughter didn't go there. I don't know anyone there, but I do know they have pretty much zero parent participation or help.

So I took the morning off to make the deliveries and every year it's the same. The office is overwhelmed with obnoxious parents who haven't done a damn thing they were supposed to for their child's enrollment. School's been on for 30 minutes and there are still kids being dropped off. The parent rolls up to the curb with their 24's all nice and shiny and their kid jumps out with no books, no backpack, pencil... anything. It's like that every year, car after car. The administration is very grateful, yet I get looks of distaste from the rude mothers, swearing and disparaging staff who are trying to fix the problems that they themselves created... all of it in front of their children. They all look me and give me attitude as I bring this stuff in... sort of ... "who does this white guy in a suit think he is."

I've made a point to simply smile and hear and speak only to the staff. They're ridiculously greatful and their thanks are sincere. They're in a losing battle and they know it, though they pretend very well to believe they're making a difference... sort of like I do. I actually don't care about blacks, hispanics, Asians, whites... whoever... I just want everyone to at least contribute something other than turmoil and conflict. I look around and see everyone taking... but not too many giving. We're all supposed to live in denial and pretend everything is okay. We can't address any problems... be it crime, fatherless homes, failing students, broken homes, etc.. because that would often times point to differing segments of society... either race or culture... so we can't do that.

Either way, it's totally disheartening. My hope for things to be better has been crushed. It started when I was the foreman in that damn murder trial a few months ago (that I wrote about) where I saw firsthand the animalistic nature of people in our society. I no longer think things will turnaround. We have a government who actually encourages this behavior and have created a culture that labels you racist, priviledged, etc., if you raise concern or point out facts. There would have to be a huge momentus shift in opinion and thought, followed by swift, unpopular, and punishing action. People would have to suffer... for their own good and good of society. it'll never happen though. Everyone is too used to going out with the singular pupose of "getting theirs."

There was one lady, particularly rude and aggressive, swearing at everyone, etc. She said to one of the ladies... a volunteer in her sixties... "I don't need to listen to some stupid ol'e white b*tch." I walked over to her, litterally about to punch her in the face. I mean I literally wanted to beat her within an inch of her life. I grabbed one of the backpacks and said, I see that your son doesn't have a backpack. I knelt down and said do you like Ninja Turtles or IronMan? I gave him the turtle bag walked over to the volunteer lady gave her a hug and went out to my car and came within a nanosecond of crying.

Nancy said to me last night... "You're not angry... you're just sad and you don't know how to deal with it." I don't know maybe. I think I'm pretty angry. I'm sick of how people behave. I"m tired of society not addressing the downward spiral of our culture and not calling a spade a spade. I'm pretty much with J Garcia who posted above... I pretty much hate everyone. My biggest fear is that I'm going to start becoming part of the problem. I feel like I want to just stick my head in the sand too. I don't want to give or help anymore. I'm just tired of seeing all that and nothing ever changing.

Hey Chris, first off good for you and your wife for giving, I used to call it "giving back" but then I realized no one gave me sh!t, I had to work for it... If you have the time I would like to explain to you my full circle for "giving"...
Me and my wife are young we don't have much, 2 kids, a mortgage, shes in school, I'm working 80 hours a week to put a lousy $400 {11 months a year} a month in savings, the rest is going to BILLS... Every year at thanksgiving, me my wife and my kids would go and buy our turkey and thanksgiving dinner, we would take a carriage each, my carriage was for our dinner and the other 3 carriages were for donating, we put the same stuff in each carriage, we stopped at our house to drop off our bags, then took the rest of the food to our church. We have done this every year since my oldest son was 4 and my youngest was 2... Xmass time my wife bought a bunch of extra toys and dropped them off at church, every year t4t gets a check from us, every year ALZ gets a check from us, ect. ect, ect. We didn't have much for ourselves back then, by no means poverty level and we lived good, BUT we gave a good amount too...
Now don't get me wrong a lot of this was my wife, I loved the feeling I got but I loved watching her enjoy it much more...

So fast forward a handful of years, my hard work is paying off my wife is done with school and lands the job of a lifetime, the kids are getting less expensive {no more diapers}, things are starting to "pay off" and I get in a situation where I had to go all in and money was very tight for a solid year, even though we were living very good, new house, stopped working my job and went all in on my own business, lots and lots of expenses... So my wife actually said, "this year we can't give as much as we should", I agreed, money was tight... So that year we did the thanksgiving shopping as we always did and we donated to toys for tots as we always did but the checks the acs, alz, ect did not get sent out, and that feeling I got from giving was replaced by something else, I don't know if it was shame or sadness but it sucked... BUT then to make it worse the phone calls start "wheres our donations" so I am like WTF, is wrong with these people, and my wife didn't have much to say about it, but I was turned off, I was pissed, that instead of appreciating what we have done in previous years they were only worried about why we didn't give this year, we got letters asking for donations, it sucked...

So the next year things were good, my business was doing excellent and a couple girls at my wife's work had babies so she got a ton of over time, and that year we gave as much as we could, even though the previous year had me jaded a little, my wife talked me through it...

So fast forward a few more years, things are really good financially and family wise, the kids are growing up well and healthy, money is good, another new house, we continue to GIVE...

Then one time a couple years back my wife was working, I had just finished our current home and I had to go to the toy drive myself... I hadn't done it in years and it was in a new place... I go with my kids and buy a few hundred dollars of toys, we go to the drive and open the back of the truck.. The volunteers were so happy, I guess up here most people drop off a couple things, not a truck full... So they asked if we wanted to help give them out.. I said sure, I had nothing better to do and its good for the kids..
Well one of the mothers of these 3 kids walks up and the kids get to take 1 toy a piece, her old kid grabbed a toy and she approved then the next one grabbed a stuffed animal, she grabbed her arm and said "no", so now I am thinking maybe someone is allergic or this lady has a thing against stuffed animals, so the kid grabs a toy car {matchbox}, and she shakes her head no, she walks over and grabs a big box {obviously more expensive toy, I don't remember what it was} and carries it through. Now I am thinking, the kid didn't want that, you just took it because its more expensive? So then while the 3rd child is picking his toy the second one starts to open the toy the mom picked, she grabs the kid and takes the toy away, thats when the older kid said "these aren't for us"!!!! SO I AM LIKE WHAT?... The mother was helping the last kid pick his expensive toy so I walk over and said "of course these are for you", and the kid said "no we return them"!!!!!

Now the mother seen me talking to the kid and hurried over, she said "thank you" and walked them all back to her car, so I said to the volunteer "whats that about?" she replaied "yah a lot of these parents, take the toys back to walmart and get gift card refunds then sell the gift cards" So I am like "thats BS, why don't you cut off the UPC's so they can not do that" she said they talked about it before but if the parent is going to get rid of the toys they are going to do it no matter what".... SO I was like "don't tell me that because I will never bring another toy here..." She said "nope, don't leave yet, there is still hope..."

About an hour later a couple comes in with 2 kids one was a baby {under 6mos} and the other maybe 3 or 4, judging by their looks and car, they were not doing well, but the kids were well dressed and the baby was in a nice carrier... So the mom asks, can my son pick 2 gifts his sister is not old enough to know the difference, so I said sure... This little boy looked all over and weighed his decision he picks up two of the toys I bought with my kids {a 24" spider man figure of course and the matching woverine } he picks the spiderman and puts wolverine down, and then his mom says you can pick one more, so he is looking and looking and picks up this small pink elephant stuffed animal, so I am like WTF, this kid is weird, how do you play with a 2 foot spiderman and a tiny stuffed animal? ESPECIALLY when I had the 2ft wolverine rite there...... So she says to him "thats what you want"? and he said "yah for tif {obviously his little sister}..." I was stunned, 4 years old, he didn't pick up the obvious toy he wanted for himself instead he got his sister something, INSTANTLY made up for the earlier situation...

BUT THEN my son seen what the little boy did and said "dad, do I get a toy" and I said "NO" I looked at him like WTF, you got so many toys now you want to take one out of the hands of a another kid, I instantly got this sick feeling like "HOW DID I RAISE THIS KID?" I felt ashamed of my son, especially since the volunteers heard him, and he was old enough to know better.. So the volunteer said, "sure you can have a toy, all kids can have 1 toy", she gave me a look like "its ok, hes a little kid".... I am really turning red now, I have never felt this way, anger, embarrassment, I don't know what else, I wanted to choke the lil bastid....

He walks over and picks up the Wolverine figure that the kid had, I couldn't even watch!!! Then he runs down to the couple with the little boy who were filling out the papers for xmass dinner delivery {awesome program, they deliver dinner to families on xmass eve all cooked and ready to go, all donated and cooked in local restaurants kitchens} and my son handed the boy the toy. I looked over at the volunteer and she said "I knew it", she knew what my son was thinking and I didn't, lol... I felt a entire new set of emotions, shame onmy part for being a douche and proud of my son for being a good boy...

So I learned some stuff that day, while some people are bad some are good and even if you have to cross a few bad ones to help one good one, its still worth it..

That after noon I got home and gave my wife a huge hug, I had to share the story with her, and she said "we have good boys" and I told her "because of you. if it were for me I would have never given after the phone calls and letters from when we didn't have enough to give, or after seeing the women selling the toys from her kids hands...

You just have to realize that you are helping others to make you feel good, the fact you are doing it for people that don't appreciate it or expect it sometimes just means you have to try harder to find the good...

I have gotten a lot of my friends that do not "give" to give, we have a party every year for the local schools, raising money so the kids can play sports in neighboring schools that cant afford the programs... We are now so far ahead we are raising money for the 2017 school year, lol...

Don't give up Chris, helping people is what we HAVE to do if we are able. If I see someone stuck on the road, I stop and make sure everything is alright, if they need gas I will go pick some up for them, if they have a flat and don't look capable of changing the tire I will do it, if they need money for a tow I will call my triple A service in. I see a fire in the news with tenants {not home owners insurance will take care of them}, I have my office manager call and find out if they have renters insurance, if not we help out. Last year, I gave a family of 3 an apartment for 3 months and another friend of mine who owns a furniture warehouse gave them all new furniture {some used but new to them}, another friend of mine who owns a
dry cleaners let them pick through his used clothes store for all new clothes {well not new but they were happy about it, he only keeps like new perfect clothes, he owns a bunch of drycleaners and gets tons of clothes}... The snrise paper contacted us to do a story about it and I refused, one of my buddies was like "WTF free advertisement" and I said thats not why we do things like this, not for "free advertisement" I said if I let you have them write it up in the paper that awesome feeling we have from doing it would be cheapened by gaining from it... He didn't agree but I am bigger than him so I got my way, lol...

Keep your head up, don't get depressed about people, it takes all kinds...

PS maybe you just need to find a new way to give, I would go before school starts and ask the office staff to distribute the supplies to kids they know will appreciate them... Inner city families are different than most of us, I call it priorities {which my wife hates when I say for some reason}, but the kids have $150 sneakers on and no money for lunch, the parents have 22" wheels on a 88 delta with a bad head gasket... I know priorities are a tough part of life, and a lot of people are guilty of not having them in the correct order... Now I am not talking about the guy with the Dodge viper that lives in the trailer park, you want to live in a house with wheels and drive a viper that is fine with me, or he people that rent a house and drive a $100K BMW, that is fine with me, you like to rent and have a nice car, or like to be able to move, what ever... But the people that can't afford to get their kid a backpack and have fancy wheels on their car bothers me, the people who can't afford to fee their kids and get foodstamps but have money to put $100 a month in their boyfriends prison accounts pisses me off...

 

[JohnnieB]

I think everyone is angry. We live in a society bombarded with self serving, trendy messages. The next big thing for 15 minutes is how we live our lives. This is the culture we have nurtured and have no one to blame but ourselves.

I used to be angry. I drank excessively. My marriage was lost and so was I. Anger, depression, despair are demons we all fight to some extent.

The problem is we place expectations on everyone. If even in small, seemingly unnoticeable ways, we expect others to have the same concerns and be considerate, if even to their own plight. When we place expectations on others, there is no other outcome, than to be disappointed at some level.

We must learn to be good servants to each other. To give without expecting a return because we care. To have patience and understanding, and realize, we cannot control anything or anyone beyond ourselves. Humility in the fact that we all make mistakes and forgiveness not only for others, but ourselves as well.

Thank you for giving, even though it seems it sometimes goes unappreciated. Thank you for being a light in this world. It's not easy. Sometimes my light is a little dim too. Know that there are people in this world who pray everyday for you and everyone else. Keep up the good fight.

You have someone that you can talk too and this is important. Let her take on your worries and respond in kind. Being a good servant to each other, helps us forget about our own troubles and allows us to focus on others. When the trouble is not ours directly it can somehow be easier to deal with.

 

[rnatalli]

I floated in the pool last night, in the rain, drinking a bottle of fairly expensive wine out of the bottle. Nancy came out to talk to me and we finally got to the bottom of what was really bothering me. Each year, we go out and buy supplies for the two elementary schools in the not so great part of town. They're both "F" graded schools, predominately balck and hispanic. When Walmart and Office Depot have their big sales, we fill a bunch of storage bins with paper, folders, notebooks, pencils, markers, backpacks, shoes, etc. We give one of the schools a laptop each year... nothing fancy, usueally one of our old ones, but something that they can really use. My daughter didn't go there. I don't know anyone there, but I do know they have pretty much zero parent participation or help.

So I took the morning off to make the deliveries and every year it's the same. The office is overwhelmed with obnoxious parents who haven't done a damn thing they were supposed to for their child's enrollment. School's been on for 30 minutes and there are still kids being dropped off. The parent rolls up to the curb with their 24's all nice and shiny and their kid jumps out with no books, no backpack, pencil... anything. It's like that every year, car after car. The administration is very grateful, yet I get looks of distaste from the rude mothers, swearing and disparaging staff who are trying to fix the problems that they themselves created... all of it in front of their childdren. They all look me and give me attitude as I bring this stuff in... sort of ... "who does this white guy in a suit think he is."

I've made a point to simply smile and hear and speak only to the staff. They're ridiculously greatful and their thanks are sincere. They're in a losing battle and they know it, though they pretend very well to believe they're making a difference... sort of like I do. I actually don't care about blacks, hispanics, Asians, whites... whoever... I just want everyone to at least contribute something other than turmoil and conflict. I look around and see everyone taking... but not too many giving. We're all supposed to live in denial and pretend everything is okay. We can't address any problems... be it crime, fatherless homes, failing students, broken homes, etc.. because that would often times point to differing segments of society... either race or culture... so we can't do that.

Either way, it's totally disheartening. My hope for things to be better has been crushed. It started when I was the foreman in that damn murder trial a few months ago (that I wrote about) where I saw firsthand the animalistic nature of people in our society. I no longer think things will turnaround. We have a government who actually encourages this behavior and have created a culture that labels you racist, priviledged, etc., if you raise concern or point out facts. There would have to be a huge momentus shift in opinion and thought, followed by swift, unpopular, and punishing action. People would have to suffer... for their own good and good of society. it'll never happen though. Everyone is too used to going out with the singular pupose of "getting theirs."

There was one lady, particularly rude and aggressive, swearing at everyone, etc. She said to one of the ladies... a volunteer in her sixties... "I don't need to listen to some stupid ol'e white b*tch." I walked over to her, litterally about to punch her in the face. I mean I literally wanted to beat her within an inch of her life. I grabbed one of the backpacks and said, I see that your son doesn't have a backpack. I knelt down and said do you like Ninja Turtles or IronMan? I gave him the turtle bag walked over to the volunteer lady gave her a hug and went out to my car and came within a nanosecond of crying.

Nancy said to me last night... "You're not angry... you're just sad and you don't know how to deal with it." I don't know maybe. I think I'm pretty angry. I'm sick of how people behave. I"m tired of society not addressing the downward spiral of our culture and not calling a spade a spade. I'm pretty much with J Garcia who posted above... I pretty much hate everyone. My biggest fear is that I'm going to start becoming part of the problem. I feel like I want to just stick my head in the sand too. I don't want to give or help anymore. I'm just tired of seeing all that and nothing ever changing.

I have to say, I completely understand. There are definitely good people out there, but they are far and few between. Here's my rant using a recent personal example:

My nephew was accepted to top tier private school here is Massachusetts and received a financial aid package. However, he decided he wants to attend public school to be with his friends and his parents have gone along with this. He isn't my child so not my decision, but my problem with this is it’s sort of like sticking your head in the sand with regards to life, let me explain.

I was recently at the mall, and the same nephew was interested in a pair of sneakers costing close to $200. Seriously, $200 for Chinese made sneakers that just so happen to have some basketball player’s name on it? That aside, how does he expect to afford expensive things later in life without taking advantages of opportunities when they present themselves? Granted, going to a top tier private school by no means guarantees this, but it certainly tips the odds in your favor. What kills me is parents like so many others often complain about how the top 2% have robbed this country. Do you think some of those folks who came from privilege have parents who sat on the sideline when their kid(s) came to them to say they wanted to go to a public school because their friends will attend? I used to work as an “evil” investment-banker and can tell you that wasn’t even an option in those households. These complaints coming from the same parents who can afford to buy a 60" LED TV, but don't buy their kids what they need for school, private or public.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that what the bankers did in 2008 wasn’t amoral and unethical, but it wasn’t illegal so they got away with it. They’re also working 100+ hours per week looking for ways to line their pockets. I’m a left leaning political person, but have no tolerance for those who want to work 9 to 5, enjoy their holidays, not work hard in general, pass every good opportunity that comes along, but somehow still feel entitled to obtain more than those around them. I now work for a non-profit and it was a conscious decision to leave the investment-banking world 12 years ago and haven’t once complained.

My parents immigrated to the U.S. in 1968 and my dad worked for a children clothes company cutting fabric until he retired. That didn’t stop me from making it through Harvard. It’s truly amazing how fine the line is between those who get ahead and those who don’t; it isn’t as gray as I once thought and that little extra willingness to work hard and learn is all it takes in pretty much anything in life. I’m no genius, but have real grit, just like my parents, which is what got me through. And believe it or not, the system isn’t as unfair as most people think if they would just open their eyes.

So we have people who turn away good opportunities and later in life wonder why they can’t afford $200 sneakers and decide to simply complain about how unfair the system is. We have people that squander their time. We have people who want everything for nothing. We have people who consistently blame others for their woes. One can either complain about how the system is arranged or take advantage of opportunities when they come up. An idealist will opt to change the system and nothing wrong with that, but they look for ways to break it down instead of just complaining. Nothing wrong with living simple lives either, just don’t be one of those people who complain that they’re only in that simple life because others have everything locked up because you have no one to blame but yourself.

Ok, my rant is over; didn’t even stop to correct my punctuation and grammar. Hopefully I’m not sounding like an elitist.

Chris, you're a good person and nothing wrong with helping people, I do it all the time; but I'm selective on who I help. I help animals, I help children, I help those who aren't to blame. Again, it's this little extra that makes the difference in all things.

 

[Rickster71]

Reminds me of a quote:

"Givers have to set limits because takers rarely do."

 

[W. Kunstler]

I'm a long time lurker, I had to create register in order to respond to this.

ImcLoud. "I made the rule, you talk money in shop and you are fired" You sir, are in violation of Federal Law. Workers have the absolute right to discuss their wages, ant time, anywhere. Your employees should look into filing a lawsuit.

Rickster71. "Sounds like some admin should be fired." Since workers can discuss their compensation, admin probably can to. Though it's iffy if he/she read it on a form. I certainly wouldn't do any firing without seeking legal advice.

itchris. Take a pill, dude.

For the elders: "Power to the People!"
For the youngsters: "This Is What Democracy Looks Like!"

 

[j_garcia]

I'm a long time lurker, I had to create register in order to respond to this.

ImcLoud. "I made the rule, you talk money in shop and you are fired" You sir, are in violation of Federal Law. Workers have the absolute right to discuss their wages, ant time, anywhere. Your employees should look into filing a lawsuit.

Rickster71. "Sounds like some admin should be fired." Since workers can discuss their compensation, admin probably can to. Though it's iffy if he/she read it on a form. I certainly wouldn't do any firing without seeking legal advice.

itchris. Take a pill, dude.

For the elders: "Power to the People!"
For the youngsters: "This Is What Democracy Looks Like!"

I think you might be wrong about someone ELSE discussing someone's salary. No matter how they discovered that, it is considered personal information and cannot be disclosed by another. If in a position to have access to that information, that means the person has the responsibility not to disclose that type of information and that is often under grounds of termination. If that person openly discusses their own personal information with others, that's their choice.

I'd also have to say you might want to know a little more about Chris story before telling him to "take a pill". Not exactly a point winning first post.

 

[Rickster71]

I'm a long time lurker, I had to create register in order to respond to this.

You stopped lurking and this is the thread that got you off the fence?... Seriously?

Rickster71. "Sounds like some admin should be fired."

Since workers can discuss their compensation, admin probably can to. Though it's iffy if he/she read it on a form. I certainly wouldn't do any firing without seeking legal advice.

My wife has had her own accounting business for 25+ years. She does hundreds of payrolls.
It's completely unprofessional for an admin to discuss/divulge someone's salary.
Likewise when peers discuss among themselves.

Are you sure Chris is the one that should take a pill?

 

[ImcLoud]

I'm a long time lurker, I had to create register in order to respond to this.

ImcLoud. "I made the rule, you talk money in shop and you are fired" You sir, are in violation of Federal Law. Workers have the absolute right to discuss their wages, ant time, anywhere. Your employees should look into filing a lawsuit.

Rickster71. "Sounds like some admin should be fired." Since workers can discuss their compensation, admin probably can to. Though it's iffy if he/she read it on a form. I certainly wouldn't do any firing without seeking legal advice.

itchris. Take a pill, dude.

For the elders: "Power to the People!"
For the youngsters: "This Is What Democracy Looks Like!"

You are are part of whats wrong with this country...
The first guy to say "sue them" or "they can't do that", lol...

As for your reply to me, you can not sue someone because they fired you unless you are under contract and they fired you for discrimination or retaliation, well actually you can sue anyone for anything in this country, but I would most definitely counter suit for costs incurred..... All of my employment policies are signed and recorded, all of my employees sign an "at will" agreement. An employee can not sue me for terminating them on breech of their employment contract, I am not unionized. And they are employed "at will", I can terminate their employment at any time for any reason, its that simple..

The Labor relations act {written in the 30's} does say that pay secrecy is not allowed, I agree, and I have never had to fire someone for it, when I do I will take my $500 fine and risk of losing government contracts for not abiding by the NLR {I don't work for the government so no loss there} and I will keep my policy...

I am not a big company, my employees are all VERY will paid, some well over $100K per year, and they know that I am more than fair, they know its a great place to work, so they follow my rules, and they don't complain or "sue" me.. I personally hire them all and know when someone is a "tool bag" or a decent honest person, I am not running a sweat shop paying my employees peanuts. If I ever do have to enforce a policy that I wrote and is going to result in termination, and I think I may have a law suit problem, I didn't get where I am by being stupid, I will know why the person is being fired but I will simply terminate them, I don't have to give a reason, they are hired "at will"...
I can fire them because I am having a bad day if I wanted to...

Now as far as you coming here to troll, that's a fun way to spend your unemployed time, but your wife is going to want her PC back soon so she can go back to cleaning the kitchen naked for some webcammers, its the 3rd and the landlord is going to want Junes rent by the 5th or you will be back in the shelter waiting for your moms SSI check to clear so you can get some ointment for the std's your wifes father gave her when he found her "playing" with the family dog and she was kind enough to share with you...

I think I got everything there, we got incest, poverty, beastiality, disabled mom, loose wife, that should do...


As far as telling chris to take a pill, I don't think this forum is a good fit for you, the guy expresses his feelings and you "bag on him" in your first post, go back to lurking out side little boys windows while rubbing your inadequate manhood on your oiled up zipper...

OK, just for good measure I threw in pedofilia and and micro fallus...

 

[itschris]

I'm a long time lurker, I had to create register in order to respond to this.

itchris. Take a pill, dude.

For the elders: "Power to the People!"
For the youngsters: "This Is What Democracy Looks Like!"

Welcome to the forum.

 

[JohnnieB]

What kind of pill is it? Did you bring enough for the whole class?