Unbelievable Golf Tales for Golf Junkies

[Buckeye_Nut]

I don’t normally talk golf much in this forum, but I have a few fresh whopper golf tales that I positively cannot keep to myself.

Today was one of those rare Sundays that I able to play 36 holes, and my scores were nothing to brag about, but I have a few whopper golf stories. Before today, I have eagled a total of two par4s in my lifetime, but that total rose to FOUR today!! Yep, I had a PAIR of par-4 deuces on the same freaking day!!


The first came on my first nine of the day early this morning. It was an uphill 408yd par4. I hit a weak slicing tee-shot that ended up in the rough on top of a big mound. From 160 out, I jarred an 8-iron for a deuce. It was a thing of beauty, and I was able to see it trickle into the cup(thanks to my vantage point on a large mound...LOL). Had I been down on the fairway, I would have never seen it fall into the cup. hahahahahaha

The rest of my story picks up on my 35th & 36th holes of the day. I flipflopped nines, so I finished my day playing the 8th and 9th holes. Through the first 7 holes, I experienced a nightmare and was +10 through 7. I carry a middle single-digit HC, so I was none too pleased with my 4th nine performance. To say that I was hot under the collar would be an understatement.

Ok, now back to the golf!! The 8th hole(my 17th) is a 362yd dogleg. The direct route to the green is protected by a 270yd forced carry over a creek and marshy area to reach the fairway on the far side of the hazard. Being hot under the collar, I pulled driver and figured what the hell. I carried the hazard, and reached the fairway just short of the green. I was left with a tough little 40yd slightly uphill pitch from a tight fairway lie to a tucked front pin. My pitch flew into the upslope just short of the fringe, and it killed it perfectly. The ball hopped up softly...... trickled about 7 feet and into the jar for my 2ND DEUCE OF THE DAY!!!

It gets better!! The 9th hole is a 500yd par5. I hit a nice tee shot in the fairway, and was left with 225 left to the pin. I pull 5-wood and hit it as straight as you can point right at the pin!!! The ball landed about 10ft short, and trickled up to about 2 1/2 to 3 feet from the jar. I kid you not that when that ball released up to the flag, my playing partner and myself both thought it was going to drop. From 225 out in the fairway, it looked like it stopped on the lip of the cup. LOL I nailed the short putt, and holed my 3rd eagle of the day!!! Ya gotta love those EAGLE-EAGLE finishes!!! I've never once made more than 1 eagle on the same day, needless to say three. Before today, I only made 4 eagles in all of 2006 in 80+ rounds of trying.

What an amazing day!! As a weekend hack amateur, I doubt today’s feat will ever be duplicated. (not by me anyway)

Whatta crazy day!!

 

[Buckeye_Nut]

OK, doesnt anyone have any crazy golf tales that they would like to share?

That was the whole point. I figured that others would pipe in with their miracle shots........LOL At least that was what I expected, and hoped for.



....or does nobody here play golf?

 

[Haoleb]

I bring a baseball bat in my golf bag just incase, And the most fun part is power sliding the golfcart on wet grass...

I dont think this post is really about the kind of golf stories that I have. But since you asked

One of the last times I went golfing we were with this guy that used to work for my dad. Well hes kind of a drunk so of course the golf bag is loaded with beer and ice. Plus, who goes golfing without the biggest pouch on their bag turned into a cooler? Anyhow thats beside the point. So here we are taking yeagermeister shots while waiting for the guys in front of us to hurry up because for some reason people who are super serious about golf take a long time.

well fast forward a few holes and here I am with like a 4 iron shooting uphil to get onto the green... well see my bag was the one that had the beers and ice in it so ya know.. there might be a bit more moisture in there than normally should be. This was bad idea number 1 Anyway i go to take my shot and of course well im a rather big guy so i just want to hit that ball so hard that the skin peels off, I dont care if it doesnt go in the hole.. Well this was bad idea number 2. So i swing that club with all i got and on the backswing it sort of flies out of my hands and goes about 50 feet in the air and lands in a tree like 40 feet away. Luckly it didnt get stuck in there because I dont think even with 2 golf carts hitting the tree at full speed would we be able to knock it loose. Lets just say the grip may have been a little wet...


So after that little fiasco we on the 17th hole and guess what. This place has all kind of game birds all over the place. One in particular. the common peacock, it makes this laughing sound. Now i dont know if they just make that sound for us, or everyone that golfs there but if your a hunter, sort of drunk and want to take one home to eat you might just be so inclined to do so after listening to their bird calls all day.

So here we are teeing off at the 17th and these things are right there with us. the drunk guy that we're golfing with wants to take one home so bad that he can taste it. So me and my dad hit off our shots and go ahead... well after about 5 mins here comes the guy in his cart rambling down the hill with no shirt on. Why no shirt? well apparently because hes got a peacock stuffed in his golf bag and its rolled up in the shirt. Well this is a really bad idea because the tail feathers are sticking out of the top of his bag and we have to go right by the clubhouse to get to the truck.. Well apparently what happened was he lured the bird to his cart with some peanuts and sort of gave it the ole' hole in one with a putter. You get the idea so I wont go into anymore detail than that. So after some argument about getting kind of busted for hunting on the couse we convince him to stuff the birds tail feathers in his bag so nobody sees it which he didnt want to do because they broke and he wanted to keep them.

Well anyway we didnt even bother with the 18th hole and left. I guess he had cooked the bird for dinner the night after. But was pretty bummed he didnt get to put the feathers on his wall as they are quite nice if you havent seen them before.

So there you go...thats one of my golf stories.

 

[Buckeyefan 1]

While playing a course in Pa., we were on a long 600+ yard par 5 with an extreme dogleg left over a hill. I pulled my drive left, but hit it well. It hit the cart path, went up the hill, must have hit a rock, bounced onto the green, and allowed me to make my first 2 on a par 5. It was as good as a hole in one.

Playing a course up in northeast Ohio, I hit two flags on two par 3's in the same day. The balls dropped straight down within inches of going in. To date, I have yet to nail a hole in one.

More than 10 years ago, we were playing a course in Pittsburgh. Those courses if you've ever been there are very hilly. It was a company outing, and many guys were playing their first round. Alcohol was free and in no short supply. I distinctly remember one guy trying to get up a steep hill (by himself) in his cart, sideways. He failed misearbly. He rolled the cart down that hill while his clubs were flying out like pop corn. Luckily he wasn't hurt. It was the funniest thing we'd seen in years. We laughed so hard we couldn't play the next two holes.

That's an amazing story you tell. It keeps us coming back. I've found there aren't that many golfers at this site. Every time I bring it up, guys keep saying they'd rather watch paint dry. The point is to play the game, and not try watching it in 5.1 surround HD.

 

[Tomorrow]

While playing a course in Pa., we were on a long 600+ yard par 5 with an extreme dogleg left over a hill. I pulled my drive left, but hit it well. It hit the cart path, went up the hill, must have hit a rock, bounced onto the green, and allowed me to make my first 2 on a par 5. It was as good as a hole in one.

Playing a course up in northeast Ohio, I hit two flags on two par 3's in the same day. The balls dropped straight down within inches of going in. To date, I have yet to nail a hole in one.

More than 10 years ago, we were playing a course in Pittsburgh. Those courses if you've ever been there are very hilly. It was a company outing, and many guys were playing their first round. Alcohol was free and in no short supply. I distinctly remember one guy trying to get up a steep hill (by himself) in his cart, sideways. He failed misearbly. He rolled the cart down that hill while his clubs were flying out like pop corn. Luckily he wasn't hurt. It was the funniest thing we'd seen in years. We laughed so hard we couldn't play the next two holes.

That's an amazing story you tell. It keeps us coming back. I've found there aren't that many golfers at this site. Every time I bring it up, guys keep saying they'd rather watch paint dry. The point is to play the game, and not try watching it in 5.1 surround HD.

Hey! What's wrong with watching paint dry?! Whatcha think us retired guys do all day?! One...I can't talk HT all day because I just get jealous of you real Audioholics and can only 'brag' (not the right term) about my...gag...JBL speakers and can't afford better. Two...I can't golf because all my Titleist clubs have strange right angles put in them from something or other. (Some still have tree bark on them. As Winston Churchill used to say, "Golf is but a stroll ruined.") And three, my wife told me that's what I'm supposed to do.

Good cheer and may your pin flags and pin feathers be bright. Good show, Nut.

 

[The Dukester]

Although I only get to play a very few times per year, I enjoy hacking, I mean golfing when I get the chance. I don't have any whoppers, since I have like a 39 handicap, but a couple of laughers.

A few years ago in a church tournament a freind of mine was teeing off on the next hole while we were putting on ours. Next thing I know he is yelling "FOUR!!!!" His ball lands on our green, close to a hole in one. Only thing is he is about 30 yards away at about an 85 degree angle from us. His ball went almost straight up and 90 degrees out. His partners were lying on the tee box laughing.

Once I was playing a round with a couple of friends. I was teeing off on a hole where there was a creek on the right almost all the way down the fairway and a pond on the left. I took a mamouth swing and actually hit the ball...well, sort of. The club head flew off and went left into the middle of the pond about 30 yards out and the ball went probably 35 yards right into the creek. I was left with the shaft...nothing unusuall. My buddies were going out wanting to walk it off to see if the ball or the club head went further. Hillarious.

My brother is the golfer; his handicap is like 5.

One other funny story and I'm done. My brother, his middle son and I were playing at the beach a couple of years ago. They both love Beef jerkey. His son had a big bag of it in the golf cart. We are teeing off and my brother yells "Hey, look at that bird!" There is this huge crow IN the cart pecking at his nice, big, shinny bag of jerkey. Two seconds later it flys off with the whole bag. Boy, was he hot. I was falling down laughing.