Once I got in full swing of my career, I got fat and stayed fat. About 8 years ago, a friend of mine invited me to see her compete at her triathlon. I sat there watching all these people content in my fatness that I could never do any of what these people were doing, despite being a decorated athlete in high school and somewhat my first year in college. The leg coming out of the water required you climb an 8 foot sea wall that had these big railroad ties as a ladder. They were actually serving as bumpers for the larger fishing and pleasure boats but that was all cleared out for the race. So I'm sitting there and watch this girl struggling to make it up. I see her head pop up above the wall then the rest. She crawls over, gets up, and runs past me to her bike.... with one leg. She was an amputee at the upper thigh and had a prostetic rig. As I watcher run by, I suddenly felt quite stupid about myself, ashamed even. I literally left at that moment, went home, pulled my bike down and went riding. Two months later, I entered my first triathlon... the Meek and Mighty event at the big St. Anthony's event in St. Petersburg. It was a very short tri, and the swim was in the pool, but at 340lbs at the time, I finished. I nearly coded, but I finished.
Fast forward a year and half... I lost 110 pounds, added 31 pounds of muscle and was in the best shape of my adult life and getting closer to my goal of 245 and 10% body fat... which was my best physical condition my first year of college. So I had been doing a lot of sprint distance tri's and really getting into biking. I was riding 30 miles without issue at about 17-18mph pace.
Then, I got together with Nancy. Then right after that, I took a new promotion at my company and everything began to change. I had a relationship and new job and suddenly I started missing the gym days. On the weekends we hung and did stuff as opposed to my regimine of working out. It was my fault because I wanted to be with Nancy and Christina and it was a lot more fun to go have a picnic in the park rather than ride in the hot sun. I started to gain my weight back slowly but surely. The fat mentality never goes away. it's your biggest enemy. I sort of caught myself and started to turn things around but then I had my motorcycle accident. I was laid up for quite awhile and had screws and bolts in both shoulders. I had a couple shoulder surgeries after that as well along with my knee. Suddenly I had an even better excuse not to workout.
I coudn't reconcile the fact that when I went to the gym, I was never going to be who I used to be. I was never going to bench 400lbs again. I was never going to military press 225. Those days were gone, but I didn't want to adjust. So the last few years, I just made trivial attempts at getting back into shape. Work plays a huge role because it really does suck up my life. Christina is in college now, so that frees up some responsibilty time-wise. I made the decision to get back into shape a few months ago. I had to have another knee surgery but I'm at the point where I can walk and bike again. My biggest thing is that I've recognized the fat person mentality about food. I'm always worried that I'm not going to get enough. When I go out, I don't order the shrimp dish because I figure it's going to be too small, so I order the biggest steak and everything with it and leave feeling overstuffed and sick. I've come to recognize that as a severel mental sickness on my part, so about 2 or 3 months ago, I made this rule that when I go out, I just order what I want... which is usually something healthy, but was always overridden by this fat guy mentality. So I've lost about 25 pounds over the past 2 months just by eating better. I still catch myself sometimes having a bit of a panic or weighing the food options at dinner wondering if I'm going to leave satisfied, but most times I catch myself now.
I can't run anymore because of my knee, but I can ride. So I started on my normal kind of cruise bike which is easier to ride than my racing tri bike. I hadn't even been on a bike for a year. I figure it'll take me about a month to get past the a$$ ache and a month after that to get the revs back up to 80 or 90 and just generally feel comfortable again. It's really no fun right now because I'm going so slow and everything pretty much hurts. I'm invested though. We have what's called the Pinellas Trail where I live. They took the old railway and made a bike/walking trail that stretches across the county. They've been adding to it over the years and patching in other trails. There's actually a trail now that goes right outside the gates of our neighborhood which leads to a new trail they just completed when they re-did the highway that connects the to major throughfare highways that go north and south in Pinellas County. We're a stones through from the water so going on the new trail is an uphill affair like i noted. It's just a 6 mile up and back, but it's fairly brutal. I plan on using it as a TT course once I get back into full swing. I can take it either East or West to get to either of the main trails that go north and south, so 25 mile + treks are super easy and safe.
Sorry for the long post... but there you have it.
