I had a brother-in-law like that when I was married to my first wife, who was the only girl in the family.
He charmed his mother and my sister to the point that it was a major cause of our divorce.
His dad, my Brothers-in law, and I all said to let him do it for himself. He was already famous for scamming anyone who let him get close.
When his parents left Jersey to move to Las Vegas, he quit high school,went into the naval reserves. He had so many infractions that what should have taken around seven months to complete wound up taking over a year.
As I predicted, he whined to his sister (my wife) to come live with us when he got out. Between my wife and his mom, I was forced to accept the situation, but I made one stipulation that made them both grudgingly accept:
I would give him six months. If he was working or going to school to better himself, I would consider extending his stay. If not, out he goes.
I wrote this up and had them sign it, with the brothers-in-law as signing witnesses. It was cold in that house, let me tell you.
As I suspected, when he got out, he scammed everyone he came into contact with, My wife talked one of her friends into selling him a $600 hoopty at $50/week but he made one payment, when he picked it up. I refused to get between my wife and her friend and wouldn't lie to her. Whenever she called asking when he was gonna pay her, I simply said to talk to either him or my wife.
He was accepting collect calls from friends all over the country.
He had scurrilous looking types knocking at our door at all hours of the day and night wanting to talk to him. It's a good thing my neighbor (good guy) was a local cop and there was always someone there within minutes of calling the precinct.
That finally stopped when I made my wife start answering the door. Boy, was she pissed at me for making her do that!
All this time he was getting letters from the navy. I started opening them. (hey, I opened them by accident.
) It seems that he never showed up at any meetings or week-end "camp-outs". They were putting him on active status.
About five 1/2 months into the agreement, my father-in-law died. He used this for a sympathy play with my wife and MIL to stay longer. I brought up about the navy and he got a high-and-mighty about opening his mail (and my wife and MIL joined him).
I said, point blank, in front of them "When are you going back to the navy or getting out of my house". My wife glared at me and I said it's about time you choose between your brother or me. She shut up real fast. My MIL started in and I said she should take him back to Vegas if she didn't like it. SOB BIL said he didn't want to go to Vegas and simply said he can get out.
So, he set a date, which was four weeks after the funeral, when he would go back to the navy. I said he could stay until he went back to the navy, no more. It was really, really cold in that house.
So, the day comes, my wife and mother-in-law take him to the navy and drop him off. It's real cold here now.
About a week goes by and I hear through the grapevine that scott is back in town. whatever.
That night, I hear a rattling at the back door. I call the cops. By now they knew my, my house, and my situation. They come and. lo and behold, it's little scotty trying to get in. I told him I changed the locks and he started calling me every name in the book and said he had no place to go. I explained, calmly, that he could stay until he went back to the navy. He said that they discharged him. I said too bad, I lived up to my end of the bargain. Once he went back to the navy, my obligations to him ended.
I said I wouldn't press charges but that he should leave immediately.
My wife didn't say a word. She didn't have to. We both knew where this was going.
After we divorced, I heard from my other brothers-in-law (we're still friends) that scott was found at the bottom of several flights of stairs in a bad part of town, dead with a broken neck. Nobody knows if he fell or was pushed. Nobody cared.
Be careful what you're dealing with. Enabling a person does them no good.
