Why can't we keep score?

bandphan

bandphan

Banned
Good deal, I was hoping there would be a numerical value to the @$$ beatings I'll be handing out..

See, I learned sportsmanship...

You'll still get your orange slices and juice box after the game though, Scott.
If its not Capri Sun dont bother:D
 
CraigV

CraigV

Audioholic General
I'll buy that... that seems reasonable enough.


You think these kids know if they won or lost the video game they were playing on the way to the field?
Yeah, but the ones my kids play, if they don’t “win” the first go ‘round, they keep trying until they do.
 
adwilk

adwilk

Audioholic Ninja
Yeah, but the ones my kids play, if they don’t “win” the first go ‘round, they keep trying until they do.
So they know they lost and they need to keep trying (improve)?
 
O

oppman99

Senior Audioholic
Lots of valid points made in the thread already. I think there is a direct tie to the feminization of the education system. I know, on the surface it looks like a sexist comment, but it's not meant to be. With education rapidly becoming a female dominated profession, there is much more emphasis on student self-esteem and less focus on real achievement. I'm a teacher, so I've seen this first hand, and it makes me angry. I'd like to post a sign that says,"In the real world people have to achieve something before they feel good about themselves." As a society, we are so concerned about being politically correct that I'm sick of it. It's gotten to the point that the message seems to be "Do whatever you want and don't feel bad about it."

I think not keeping score is a little extreme, but consider a slightly modified situation. I used to coach middle school football and we made sure to play ALL the kids in the games even if they were terrible. If you turn a kid off to a sport, he/she will most likely quit (unless forced to play by the parents). A couple of years later, the same kid that quit hits a growth spurt and is now athletically gifted. No matter how hard the coaches try to get him/her to play again, it won't work due to the bad experience at a younger age. I have seen a number of schools who only play the "best" kids from a young age onward, and I think they miss out on some gifted players down the road. Most championchip caliber teams have quality talent that can come off the bench and contribute.

But yes, I see the big downside. Kids aren't learning the skills to cope with life anymore. Like I said, many valid points made earlier in the thread.
 
J

jostenmeat

Audioholic Spartan
But that doesnt make it "ok" right?

I get the "crazy parents" argument. but you're not solving the issue, just delaying it.

As far as sportsmanship goes, one of the most relevant things to learn regarding sportsmanship is how to win and lose properly.
Did I miss it, or did someone say what the cutoff age was for keeping score? If it's 4-6, I think there's still plenty to learn outside of winning and losing properly, and that goes for any sport.

I understand we don't want to pressure certain kids and that some might not take it well. I get it. But what are we REALLY teaching them. Shouldnt they start knowing at an early age that you get what you work for, there are no free rides. If everybody gets a trophy, then why should I dedicate my time an effort to be better than you?
How about just the simple basics? I understand your view, but as you're a golfer, I think you would also understand that losing/winning is much more clearly defined in an individual sport. The other big one being tennis. At least in golf, you might have a caddie that you can consort with. But, let's take other sports that represent much more participation by kids. Baseball's individual performances are the most statistically analyzed, perhaps, out of any sport ever. Yet, you can be an amazing performer on a mediocre team (and make big bucks, be inducted into the hall of fame, all star game, golden glove, silver slugger, blah blah). The player might not be happy about a losing record, but at that point any anger/disappointment is probably best taken out on management, and not the players.

I am NOT a proponent of coddling, and sometimes can exhibit strong competitiveness (at least I did earlier in life), or be quite demanding to those around me, but I don't know, it seems there are still so much athletic abilities to learn as it is. Turning a double play with proper footwork and positioning must take a while, I imagine. Or hitting a nice slice, or fade, let alone hitting the ball straight. Devoloping a nice kick serve for a second serve. Or learning proper spacing, timing, and cutting in a basketball set play. IOW, plenty to learn without worrying about other kids (and parents) getting all over you for a botched play. Some will be disappointed enough without the score to begin with.

So, I say it should be an option. Parents/kids who want to participate where score is being kept can choose to do so, and others can opt for the other.

Certainly not my intention at all, but it does have some serious political undertones.

I think its crap. Let little Johnny get beat once or twice and then let him decide if he's gonna work harder to better himself, establish himself as a leader or venture down a different path.

On the other hand, at least their exercising.
Yeah, mebbe. I think teaching them how to have fun is probably the most important thing. The percentage/proportion of these kids that will earn a college scholarship, let alone being a true professional, in any sport is slim at best. I am not saying that having fun is mutually exclusive to competition. But a lot of people have a hard time in combining those things, and if parents already have major issues with that, what's the kid going to think?

(Isn't it true that there is a strong dearth of referees and umpires in sports for kids these days? The pay being so poor, with inconsistent work, combined with insane parents...)

My HS basketball coaches were pretty tough, I think. Freshman year, we would jump at a basketball on the ground against one another. Plenty of blood as 14 y.o.'s. Losers have to run a distance, I forget how many laps. Sophmore coach was a drunk, and launched insane verbal epithets at the 15 y.o.'s. Junior year coach was the one cool coach. He was the only black coach I had, and he was studying criminal law at the time. Varsity coach could be a real d!ck, at least to the starters, and it's no wonder that over these four years some of our best talent quit (and did extremely well in other sports, including two kids who got scholarships at Stanford).

So, competition and toughness are good things, but it's hard to define how much of it is acceptable (depending when you lived, and where, as well), and how important fun/enjoyment should play a role in these things.

Of course, as brought up, the cultural viewpoint plays a huge role. You hear of kids getting beaten/abused in other countries, at least in older days. While true in sports, it happens in other arenas as well, such as with music, even in the US.

If you grew up in Japan, and a kid bullied the heck out of you, the teacher would probably just let him keep bullying you. Not nearly as accepted in the US, for example. Also, at least historically, the handicapped are not nearly as accepted in certain Asian countries. It's just another marked social/cultural difference. Do you say that they should coddle the handicapped more like we do, or that we should be less sensitive to those who are less able either physically or mentally? (no need to answer; I would foresee a circular argument, and FWIW I am close friends with both a former pro baseball player, and several handicapped people).

just thinking out loud.
 
CraigV

CraigV

Audioholic General
So they know they lost and they need to keep trying (improve)?
Like most kids, ours want to participate in things they enjoy doing. They take piano & voice lessons, and when they were younger, they did T-Ball (no score). Now they do “swim team”, but it’s practicing their stroke technique and breathing, there are no actual meets. I’m a recovering computergamaholic, so “gaming” must be in their blood. In all instances, we (my wife & I) reinforce the premise that in order to be good at anything in life, it requires practice & dedication. They love playing piano & singing, and they love the water, and look forward to going to practice two nights a week. They are very competitive (as much as you can be playing games on the Wii) and we’ll “trash talk” when we win, but it’s all in jest, and we all know it. It’s a bit of a different story with my oldest daughter. She has always been hesitant in trying new things when they involve any kind of physicality. She didn’t walk until she was 2, and it took a long time for her to feel comfortable in the pool. She learned how to ride a bike last spring – at the age of 12. So with her, there’s the added bit about “look at what you’re missing out on”.
I’m always encouraging them to try again, and try harder in order to achieve more/better. Should they decide to compete in sports in school, I will encourage whatever they decide to participate in and ask that they always give it their best effort, and be prepared to practice – A LOT.

The best example I can think of to give them is what I see every Sunday watching football. Before the game, some of the players from the opposing teams greet each other on the field, trade a few “jabs” and wish each other luck. At the end of the game, many players offer congratulations where appropriate & part friends. I’ve even seen some gather for an impromptu prayer service.
During the game though, it’s “game on” and the players play to win. But, even they know someone has to lose.


But hey, I think it’s in everyone’s blood to be competitive. The whole reason we’re here is because our species was in competition with other hominids – and it was because of our larger brains & ability to think & reason that made us win out. Of course, this also gave rise to complex emotions & responses, which lead to the whole “politically correct” debacle, but that’s another thread…
 
highfigh

highfigh

Seriously, I have no life.
4/5 year olds have no business keeping score IMO, because being a good sport needs to be learned first. We didn't keep score in Teeball because they wanted to teach us sportsmanship first.
How can someone learn to win or lose if nobody wins or loses?

I never played T-ball because it didn't exist when I was that age but I started playing organized softball in 2nd grade. Also, by 2nd grade, most of us could already hit a pitched ball pretty well. We kept score, we tried hard to win and when we did, we were happy & congratulated each other but also were taught to be gracious toward the other teams. "Nice game", "Maybe next time", etc were commonly offered and we expected the same when we lost. Anyone who was a sore loser learned their lesson for future games and sometimes, that meant they didn't get a malt afterward.

This "We don't keep score because we don't want the non-winners to have a bad self-image" stuff is crap. In life, people win & lose and the sooner kids learn this, the better, IMO. Try hard, win some/lose some and don't act like an *** when losing or winning. It's not possible to learn sportsmanship without winning or losing. It's just not the same and I have a hard time believing anything is learned from telling the kids "Theoretically, you won this game and this week we'll be practicing so we don't theoretically lose next week".

Kids know when they don't do well and regardless of whether it's a win/lose scenario or not, they don't like playing badly. They also want to do better. How can not keeping score in their own games be similar to seeing their favorite team win and lose while keeping score?
 
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krzywica

krzywica

Audioholic Samurai
I played competitive AA and AAA hockey from the age of 6-7 to the age of 19-20. We always kept score even at the youngest ages.

I think its a great thing as kids need to learn early to stick with something once they commit to it, even if the chips don't fall where they planned.

Learning how to gauge and control your temper and emotions are one of the key elements of competitive sports. Because without keeping score its not competitive, and with the lack of competition is neutrality, and with neutrality there is no emotional stake, thereby bypassing this important learning opportunity. I think this is a big thing with kids today as when they experience adversity or correction they often lash out and blame others for their failures instead of re-approaching the situation and working hard to improve.

These important life lessons learned early on make for a lot easier life down the road.
 
lsiberian

lsiberian

Audioholic Overlord
Scott your a **** lol sorry I couldn't resist. :D He always calls you scott and I find that funny.

How can someone learn to win or lose if nobody wins or loses?

I never played T-ball because it didn't exist when I was that age but I started playing organized softball in 2nd grade. Also, by 2nd grade, most of us could already hit a pitched ball pretty well. We kept score, we tried hard to win and when we did, we were happy & congratulated each other but also were taught to be gracious toward the other teams. "Nice game", "Maybe next time", etc were commonly offered and we expected the same when we lost. Anyone who was a sore loser learned their lesson for future games and sometimes, that meant they didn't get a malt afterward.

This "We don't keep score because we don't want the non-winners to have a bad self-image" stuff is crap. In life, people win & lose and the sooner kids learn this, the better, IMO. Try hard, win some/lose some and don't act like an *** when losing or winning. It's not possible to learn sportsmanship without winning or losing. It's just not the same and I have a hard time believing anything is learned from telling the kids "Theoretically, you won this game and this week we'll be practicing so we don't theoretically lose next week".

Kids know when they don't do well and regardless of whether it's a win/lose scenario or not, they don't like playing badly. They also want to do better. How can not keeping score in their own games be similar to seeing their favorite team win and lose while keeping score?
Yes because 4/5 years olds are in 2nd grade. :rolleyes:

As a GOP member you certainly know about winning and losing.

I'm not saying you don't have competition at 10. But little kids aren't good enough to compete. They should be learning fundamentals. Let them compete once they get the fundamentals down. The lack of fundamentals has led to decline in many sports. As well as in our society.

FYI kids still keep score even if adults don't. I know I sure as hell did. I knew when we won or lost in t-ball.
 
highfigh

highfigh

Seriously, I have no life.
Scott your a **** lol sorry I couldn't resist. :D He always calls you scott and I find that funny.



Yes because 4/5 years olds are in 2nd grade. :rolleyes:

As a GOP member you certainly know about winning and losing.

I'm not saying you don't have competition at 10. But little kids aren't good enough to compete. They should be learning fundamentals. Let them compete once they get the fundamentals down. The lack of fundamentals has led to decline in many sports. As well as in our society.

FYI kids still keep score even if adults don't. I know I sure as hell did. I knew when we won or lost in t-ball.
I thought 4/5 year olds were in kindergarten and still should be if high school ends at grade 12. I was 7 when I got into softball but we had played catch, etc before that.

Two can play this game- "As a GOP member you certainly know about winning and losing."

How much whining did the Democrats do when they lost? Algore went into seclusion and was depressed. Hillary, well,....

Kids need to see that trying harder can yield results and improvements. If nobody wins, what's the point of trying....Oh, I see. It's so someone will give them a prize anyway. That sounds too much like Welfare.

I'm in a suburb of MKE and before I was born, they started the softball leagues, headed by someone who went on to be mayor here. His idea was for only the first place team to get a trophy and the rest would get nothing. Most of the people at the meeting were ready to go along with this plan until a neighbor stood up and told them that they should be ashamed of themselves. He reminded them that these were kids and that they shouldn't all get the same prize, but they should get something for participating. From the signup fee, a season-end banquette should be held and small prizes given to them with hot dogs, etc for dinner. He thought that making the kids walk away from the season with nothing was a bit harsh at that age and I agree. This shouldn't be confused with having no winners or losers and he was a great model for us. If anyone just phoned it in, he and the rest of the coaches made it known that more effort was required. We were there to win, clearly.

He and his wife were surrogates for those of us who didn't have grandparents and they were happy to do anything for our parents. I played in a softball league about fifteen years ago and one of the first batters I saw as catcher was their son. I was in my middle 30s and he was probably closing in on 50. We had been neighbors but neither of us wanted to lose.
 
highfigh

highfigh

Seriously, I have no life.
I'm not saying you don't have competition at 10. But little kids aren't good enough to compete. They should be learning fundamentals. Let them compete once they get the fundamentals down. The lack of fundamentals has led to decline in many sports. As well as in our society.

FYI kids still keep score even if adults don't. I know I sure as hell did. I knew when we won or lost in t-ball.
10 year-olds are in 5th grade- I would hope they would have the fundamentals down by then. We had some kids who were already really good at several sports by then. We were also very competitive and constantly played baseball, football, basketball and whatever other trouble we could get into. If we lost, we tried harder. If we won, yeah, we teased the others but it wasn't personal. If someone tried to cheat, it didn't go over well, at all.

IMO, fundamentals are the mechanics of that game but what I really think has led to our problems is the lack of discipline in general. Someone can learn the fundamentals without much effort if they pay attention but to really be good at something, most need to work at it. Some have to work at it really hard and be slapped down a few times before they're really inspired, like Michael Jordon in high school.
 
J

just listening

Audioholic
The bigger problem is the fact that kids don't have unstructured playtime to be "in charge". Instead, they are constantly being run from one organized activity to another. Way too many struggle to think with creativity or lead. To the point where all they want to do in their free time is veg out and play video games.

My wife is a teacher, and by her design our kids are limited to 1 organized sport and 1 instrument or organized group (scouts). Our mantra at home is moderation in everything. They have plenty of non electronics unstructured playtime. They play pickup games all the time and are forced to self organize and referee.

To her credit their behavior and education are right where we hoped. They still mess up and face consequences, and on occasion leave me exasperated. But by every measure they'll be positive adults.
 
Rickster71

Rickster71

Audioholic Spartan
Yes because 4/5 years olds are in 2nd grade. :rolleyes:

As a GOP member you certainly know about winning and losing.
To be fair, the OP didn't mention 4/5 year olds, you did.(in post #2)
I agree with you when the age is that young, they should just learn the basics.

The problem I see in many towns (mine included) 8 - 10 year olds aren't allowed to keep score.
Also the infield isn't allowed to talk-up the batter. It's just part of PC indoctrination, and a general softening of our society.
 
STRONGBADF1

STRONGBADF1

Audioholic Spartan
My son is 8yo and plays baseball and basketball.

Don't keep score in T-ball...it's pointless anyway.;) Other than that I'm for keeping score in all sports all the time. They always did when I was young.

This all reminds me of when we met my boys kindergarten teacher for the first time.(group setting) She said not to just let your children win when playing games. She has had many problems with children who couldn't handle losing on the playground. Then it becomes the teachers problem in the class room.

BTW, we never just let our son win at games. He had to win them fair and square...and he many many times.:)

We as a society are not preparing our children for the realities of life.

All this being said...all the age appropriate rules must be in place to keep the game reasonable and also conduct rules for parents and coaches.
 
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