A letter to the Senator

adwilk

adwilk

Audioholic Ninja
The
Honorable Tom Harkin

731 Hart Senate Office Building

Phone (202) 224
3254

Washington DC , 20510





Dear Senator
Harkin,





As a native Iowan and excellent customer of the
Internal Revenue Service, I am writing to ask for your assistance. I have
contacted the Department of Homeland Security in an effort to determine the
process for becoming an illegal alien and they referred me to
you.



My primary reason for wishing to change my status from U.S.
Citizen to illegal alien stems from the bill which was recently passed
by the Senate and for which you voted. If my understanding of this bill's
provisions is accurate, as an illegal alien who has been in the United States
for five years, all I need to do to become a citizen is to pay a $2,000 fine
and income taxes for three of the last five years. I know a good deal when I
see one and I am anxious to get the process started before everyone figures it
out.



Simply put, those of us who have been here legally have had
to pay taxes every year so I'm excited about the prospect of avoiding two
years of taxes in return for paying a $2,000 fine. Is there any way that I can
apply to be illegal retroactively? This would yield an excellent result for me
and my family because we paid heavy taxes in 2004 and
2005.



Additionally, as an illegal alien I could begin using the
local emergency room as my primary health care provider. Once I have
stopped paying premiums for medical insurance, my accountant figures I could
save almost $10,000 a year.



Another benefit in gaining illegal
status would be that my daughter would receive preferential treatment relative
to her law school applications, as well as 'in-state' tuition rates for many
colleges throughout the United States for my son.



Lastly, I
understand that illegal status would relieve me of the burden of renewing my
driver's license and making those burdensome car insurance premiums. This is
very important to me given that I still have college age children driving my
car.



If you would provide me with an outline of the process to
become illegal (retroactively if possible) and copies of the necessary forms,
I would be most appreciative. Thank you for your assistance.



Your
Loyal Constituent, (hoping to reach 'illegal alien' status rather than just a
bonafide citizen of the US )



Donald Ruppert

Burlington ,
IA
 
J

jamie2112

Banned
I am speechless.....:D........I freakin love it.Where do I sign up Adam?
 
T

The Dukester

Audioholic Chief
Did you really send that? If you get a positive response, let me know.
 
adwilk

adwilk

Audioholic Ninja
I am speechless.....:D........I freakin love it.Where do I sign up Adam?
It is a pretty novel idea, isnt it? I suppose you could contact your congressman. I'm sure if enough people did it... who knows....

Did you really send that? If you get a positive response, let me know.
No, I did not send that, but I'm intrigued that somebody actually did. I don't think I would. I'm for changing how illegals are treated, knowing that our situation improves if we stop the handouts.
 
CraigV

CraigV

Audioholic General
You really need to send that in. :D If you don't, I will
 
Wafflesomd

Wafflesomd

Senior Audioholic
We had to write letters to our senators in high school.

I wrote about how they don't read our letters.
 
R

ragged

Senior Audioholic
Go to Mexico, become a Mexican Citizen, then come back across the border illegally:D
 
speakerman39

speakerman39

Audioholic Overlord
Now that is what I call telling it like it is. However, even if someone does send this letter in it is doubtful it will be read by the Senator. Most of the time, his/her staff does all of the work-especially with things like that. I must say, however, that this letter has given me much to think about. Excellent write-up imho. ;););)



Cheers,

Phil
 
Alex2507

Alex2507

Audioholic Slumlord
That letter needs a date. 911 changed some of our immigration laws if I am to believe my illegal alien ... yes, I own one. :D Beyond that some fact checking needs to be done before I go line, hook and sinker on that. Not that I'm willing to do it on my own but a copy of the bill or a way to look it up and a record of the vote would really go a long way toward plausibility on that ... just sayin'.

That idea of leaving the country and coming back in as an illegal created a spark. How about 'the man' confiscates all your assets, wipes the English language from your memory and dumps your broke @ss in Mexico City to fend for yourself and your family ... :eek: You might learn to appreciate that nothing is easy. :)
 
adwilk

adwilk

Audioholic Ninja
That letter needs a date. 911 changed some of our immigration laws if I am to believe my illegal alien ... yes, I own one. :D Beyond that some fact checking needs to be done before I go line, hook and sinker on that. Not that I'm willing to do it on my own but a copy of the bill or a way to look it up and a record of the vote would really go a long way toward plausibility on that ... just sayin'.

That idea of leaving the country and coming back in as an illegal created a spark. How about 'the man' confiscates all your assets, wipes the English language from your memory and dumps your broke @ss in Mexico City to fend for yourself and your family ... :eek: You might learn to appreciate that nothing is easy. :)
Fair Enough..
 
1

10010011

Senior Audioholic
Here you go, don't let the door hit you in the you know what on your way out.

---
(1) Leave the country. There is no procedure for renouncing your citizenship while still physically present in the U.S. The government has the idea that if you're mad enough to renounce your citizenship you probably don't want to keep living here (although most militia types seem to want to stick around, presumably to keep their disgust fresh). Also, frankly, most of the 800 or so people who renounce their U.S. citizenship each year aren't protesters but rather are cases of "dual citizenship" who haven't lived in the U.S. for a long time. What typically happens is that someone is born in the U.S. to non-U.S. parents, who later return to their native land. Such a person is automatically a U.S. citizen but has a claim to his parents' nationality also. While dual citizenship is usually not illegal--the U.S. "tolerates" it--it can complicate your life, notably in connection with taxes. So many people choose one or the other on reaching adulthood.

(2) Apply for citizenship somewhere else. Strictly speaking this is optional, in the sense that it's optional to put on the parachute before you jump out of the plane. But if you're a stateless person living abroad and you get in a jam with the local authorities, or you want to get a passport to travel to yet another country (or back to this one), you're up fecal matter creek.

(3) Go to a U.S. embassy or consulate and tell them you want to renounce your citizenship. Often they'll try to talk you out of it, tell you to come back after you've slept it off, etc. Persist. Eventually they'll have you sign an oath of renunciation, an affidavit affirming the oath, and a "statement of understanding," which basically asks you if you're sure you know what you're doing. You also have to supply certain tax-related info and turn in your passport. The consular officer overseeing the proceedings must sign an attestation saying that in his opinion you're not off your nut. The papers will then be forwarded to the U.S. state department, which in the fullness of time will issue you a Certificate of Loss of Nationality.
---
You're officially un-American, sneak back in and start living the dream.
 
Alex2507

Alex2507

Audioholic Slumlord
This could work out OK for me...:D
As soon as Obama fixes the economy, I'll hook you up with some union work. :D

You and everybody else you know could stay with me in the condo, not because of any financial need but because that is just how us aliens like it. :rolleyes:
 
Davemcc

Davemcc

Audioholic Spartan
As soon as Obama fixes the economy, I'll hook you up with some union work. :D

You and everybody else you know could stay with me in the condo, not because of any financial need but because that is just how us aliens like it. :rolleyes:
When Obama is done with your economy, the Grapes of Wrath will look like the good ol' days.
 
Alex2507

Alex2507

Audioholic Slumlord
When Obama is done with your economy, the Grapes of Wrath will look like the good ol' days.
I had to check to see where I was before participating in this thread-jack but I was just starting to hear some positive things about the economy and was somewhat heartened ... until you piped in with your literary reference that would have been completely lost on me were it not for me having read it in high school out in Calgary. Mr. Hessler was a great teacher BTW.

... and it's 'our' economy. ;)
... yes, we're stealing your identity. :)
 

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