You talk about setting up a brand new home theater but no mention of your plans for a display. I therefore assume you have no display device presently.
Therefore, you may consider purchasing an audio/video receiver which will incorporate:
- HDMI switching (inputs1/output) because that is the typical input for new displays, and it is required should you wish eventually to connect a Blu-Ray player or a universal DVD player
- The ability to decode lossless audio such as Dolby Digital TruHD and DTS-HD MA
The alternative to the above is to purchased a used receiver with either HDMI switching or with 5.1 multichannel analog inputs. This will permit the connection of either a universal DVD player (to play SACD and DVD-A) or a Blu-Ray player with 5.1 multichannel analog outputs, provided the player is able to decode these lossless audio codecs. You can the connect the player's HDMI cable direct to the TV for Video.
If you plan to use your audio for music listening, speaker quality is of importance. Speakers can be attractive. Starting your planning with the notion that speakers should not be noticeable is not conducive to getting proper results. And you don't put front speakers up the ceiling... would you like to be sitting 8 feet below the stage at a concert?
Bring your wife to the speaker store so that she may develop a sense of the proper things to do.