It's interesting to read your experiences and observations about audio dealers. I haven't missed them at all.
About 14 years ago, I got re-interested in audio after years of working at a career, raising kids, and just about anything else. The high-pressure brow-beating attitude of audio shops really surprised me, as did the willingness of their customers to take that kind of abuse.
About 10 years ago, I got interested in DIY speaker building because I wanted to understand what could make speakers sound good. It was a fun learning curve, and I got to meet people such as Dennis Murphy.
One of the early take-away lessons I learned was how important a speaker's crossover could be. Average or even mediocre drivers could be made to sound very good with a properly designed crossover. And, that many commercially sold speakers had poorly designed crossovers.
Interestingly, none of the DIY speaker builders I met had anything to say about amplifiers, preamps, or cables. They were agnostics on those subjects.
One of them (who worked for the Federal Trade Commission), when asked why the FTC never pursued the makers of exotic cables and crossover parts, said "We don't go there… and you shouldn't either".
Words to live by
.