Ruh roh. Does sound like an issue with the STB then. I am going to TRY to reread your post, but next time, if possible, can you make it simpler, better paragraphed, and capitalize your "i's"? Thanks.
OK. I think I understood after a good amount of effort.
Sometimes an STB will look only once for the handshake. Essentially, exactly what MDS said. Did you understand what he said?
Otherwise, if you want to forgo that hassle, perhaps just use the component connections. They should* look just as good (though hdmi vs component seems to be vary from stb to stb).