The best thing I've used is the common carbon fibre brush. Use it before each playing as the record turns, then wipe the dust off on my t-shirt sleeve.
For the stylus, I have a Watts stylus cleaner brush which I generally use before each playing, but I sometimes use a Q-tip dipped in isopropyl alcohol (carefully).
Supposedly the Mr. Clean Magic Eraser works extremely well as a stylus cleaner.
I've managed to hang onto my vinyl, although I haven't played a record at home in a long time. But I've got several NOS cartridges and styli, and some parts to spruce up the ex-mobile-disco Technics 1200 (including a new arm). I suspect it'll be a revelation to hear many of those records on a system with real bass. Maybe after I capture 'em to DVD-R in 24/96 flac, to minimize feedback.