Halloween Story: The Audiophile

Tom Andry

Tom Andry

Speaker of the House
<SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial">
<P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt"><A href="http://www.audioholics.com/news/editorials/Halloween06.php"><FONT face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><IMG style="WIDTH: 88px; HEIGHT: 100px" alt=[ScaryDoor1] hspace=10 src="http://www.audioholics.com/news/editorials/the-audiophile/image_mini" align=left border=0></FONT></A><FONT face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">There you are – sitting in your home theater/listening room, sipping an adult beverage, feeling the music wash over and&nbsp;move you. The kind of transcendent experience that only spending <I style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal">thousands </I>of dollars on equipment and much, much more in time on placement and tweaking. This is the moment you’ve been longing for – the perfect marriage of great equipment, fantastic material, and intoxication that could make you post something asinine on the nearest audio forum. But this night is not like any night. And given the date, it doesn't look good for our fictional Audiophile.</FONT></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"><FONT face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"></FONT></SPAN>&nbsp;</P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt"><SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial"><FONT face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">[</FONT><A href="http://www.audioholics.com/news/editorials/Halloween06.php"><FONT face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">Read the Story</FONT></A><FONT face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">]</FONT></SPAN></P>
<P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt"><A href="http://www.audioholics.com/news/uploads/ScaryDoor1.jpg"><FONT face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"></FONT></A></SPAN>&nbsp;</P>
 
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JohnA

JohnA

Audioholic Chief
It was the black ooze of BOSE!!!! :eek: Stay away, stay far, far away!!!
 
Tomorrow

Tomorrow

Audioholic Ninja
Tom Andry said:
<SPAN style="FONT-SIZE: 10pt; FONT-FAMILY: Arial">
<P class=MsoNormal style="MARGIN: 0in 0in 0pt"><A href="http://www.audioholics.com/news/editorials/Halloween06.php"><FONT face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif"><IMG style="WIDTH: 88px; HEIGHT: 100px" alt=[ScaryDoor1] hspace=10 src="http://www.audioholics.com/news/thumbs/ScaryDoor1_th.jpg" align=left border=0></FONT></A><FONT face="Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif">There you are – sitting in your home theater/listening room, sipping an adult beverage, feeling the music wash over and&nbsp;move you. ;</P>
....when, suddenly, you don't feel so well...(Happy Halloween)
 
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Sheep

Sheep

Audioholic Warlord
rjbudz said:
....when, suddenly, you don't feel so well...(Happy Halloween)
Haha, I was going to do one of those this year but I didn't have the time.

SheepStar
 
Rock&Roll Ninja

Rock&Roll Ninja

Audioholic Field Marshall
Who'd a thought Lovecraftian horror is so well adapted to home theater.
The door swung wide, revealing an impossible avenue of cyclopean cubes whose gleaming basalt surfaces were carved with cryptic writings of hideous significance. Faceless, misshapen creatures shambled between the onyx boxes, while farther off in the distance, leperous forms gyred and capered in savage, degraded revelry.

"Good God" Mr. Andry breathed.

"Anybody out there seen a cappuccino-maker?" Sheep piped.

And then half-creeping, half shuffling down that monumental way, atop the bleached-white bones of countless million dead from the dawn of time, there came the ultimate vision of noisesome horror, lashing tentacles still draped with the clammy seaweeds of it's sunken kingdom. Inexorably on and on it came, it's hellish minions cavorting in its wake with languages no human mouth could speak. Their blasphemous litany accompanied it's progress until, at last, it's sinister bulk overshadowed office, desk, stacks of esoteric tube-amplified components, and the trembling Tom Andry.

"Hello!" the monsterous leviathan spoke, its voice like an uncounted chorus of rabid beasts and primordial viscious tar. "I'm Dr. Amar Bose. I've tried to reach you about reviewing my new Acoustimass® surround-sound system, but I keep getting your stupid ansswering machine."

and Andry fainted.
.
 
Tom Andry

Tom Andry

Speaker of the House
Rock&Roll Ninja said:
Who'd a thought Lovecraftian horror is so well adapted to home theater.
Wow, and I was afraid that no one would recognize the influence of my favorite horror writer. Bully for you! I'm working through his collected works from Arkham Press again right now. Great stuff. And I LOVED your little vignette. Except, aren't I suppose to wake up in my office with no knowledge of how I got there but strange marks on my body or perhaps gills? :D
 
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Tomorrow

Tomorrow

Audioholic Ninja
Tom Andry said:
Except, aren't I suppose to wake up in my office with no knowledge of how I got there but strange marks on my body or perhaps gills? :D
That sounds more like Franz Kafka, no?!
 
Seth=L

Seth=L

Audioholic Overlord
That was pretty good Tom, and the end was terrifying.:D Some smuck gets the Home theater, that is some scary stuff (he will probably sell the HT and get a Bose).

Rock&Roll Ninja said:
"Hello!" the monsterous leviathan spoke, its voice like an uncounted chorus of rabid beasts and primordial viscious tar. "I'm Dr. Amar Bose. I've tried to reach you about reviewing my new Acoustimass® surround-sound system, but I keep getting your stupid ansswering machine."
I would have laughed out loud, exept I am to tired. Did you make that up, or did that come from somewhere else?, cause that is funny.
 
Rock&Roll Ninja

Rock&Roll Ninja

Audioholic Field Marshall
Chilly for me?


I didn't actually write it. I just changed some words from Love's Eldritch Ichor.
 
agarwalro

agarwalro

Audioholic Ninja
Finally got a chance to read the story. Very cool.
 
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